 So you're getting married! Many girls have thought about this day (unconsciously, perhaps!) throughout their lives.
They dream about their stunning groom, the beautiful princess dress, the bridesmaids, the flowers, the setting and all the magic that surrounds a wedding day.
One part that doesn't often get a lot of consideration is the actual wedding ceremony. Couples these days tend to know what they don't want (e.g. they don't want to 'obey'!), but sometimes find it difficult to know what they do want. That's where the Celebrant comes in.
There are different types of celebrants: Marriage Celebrants, Civil Union Celebrants and Religious Celebrants (e.g. Priest). For those with no close connection with a church in their community or who hold no particular religious beliefs; are entering an inter-faith marriage; are inter-dominational or are non-dominational, you might want to use a Marriage Celebrant.
Marriage Celebrants, appointed by the Ministry of Internal Affairs, may conduct weddings on any day of the year, in just about any venue imaginable, e.g. private homes, beaches, parks, gardens or function centres.
Where and when should I find a Marriage Celebrant?
It's great to find a celebrant through recommendation especially if you've seen a celebrant officiating at a wedding you've attended and really enjoyed. Otherwise, there are many resources available like bridal magazines, websites: www.celebranz.org.nz, weddings.co.nz, wedding planners, the Yellow Pages or the Citizens Advice Bureau.
The super-busy wedding time in New Zealand is between November and April, and an especially big day is Valentine's Day! Key people involved in the wedding, eg Celebrants, photographers, dressmakers, hair/makeup, caterers need to be booked well in advance.
What will the Celebrant offer you?
Once you've made contact with the celebrant and had your first meeting, you want to feel as if you 'click' and are on the same wavelength. If this is not the case keep looking. It's really important that they listen to your requirements about your wedding and that they are prepared to give you plenty of advice and ideas.
Celebrants work in different ways. Some have several sample ceremonies that you can work from, and others may offer more custom-made options. The celebrant will assist by discussing the all-important legal requirements. They may also suggest readings/poetry, music, wording of the vows and ideas for other parts of the ceremony.
Once you’ve confirmed that you wish to go ahead, work begins on the ceremony. I generally find that there are plenty of emails and phonecalls backwards and forwards between celebrant and couple, and then everything falls into place.
There is generally another meeting before the wedding. This will enable the celebrant to receive the marriage documents, have a rehearsal or go over last minute details.
Above all, they will assist in creating a significant, yet relaxed and enjoyable occasion for you to enjoy and remember.
Fees
The Celebrant's fee is generally discussed during the initial phonecall, or meeting, usually ranging from $200.00 - $600.00. Charges may increase if the wedding is out-of-town, or if there are extra meetings/rehearsals required. They also may vary according to the experience of the celebrant.
Legal Requirements
You cannot be married without a Marriage Licence
The two major requirements are:
1. The legal documents must be signed at the wedding in the presence of two chosen witnesses, and a Registered Marriage Celebrant.
2. In the ceremony the bride and groom must say "I, Mary Brown take you, Paul Smith to be my legal husband", or words to that effect, and vice versa.
The website www.dia.govt.nz offers comprehensive information about the process of obtaining a Marriage Licence and any legal requirements needed.
I believe, like many celebrants, that the ceremony is the 'heart' of the wedding day.
To create a ceremony which reflects the couple, their families and community is so important.
A 'tip' I often pass onto couples, is that a wedding is not a 'performance'. The couple are not actors but experiencing one of the most significant and sacred days of their lives. Their friends and families are there to support them. If unavoidable things happen, like a plane going overhead just as the vows are being exchanged or it begins to pour with rain in the middle of the ceremony, everything will be okay.
A very experienced Minister of the Church, Robert Fulghum, wrote :
"Remember, nothing can ruin a wedding if the heart is right, and nothing can help a wedding if it's a military drill. So relax. Be there. Notice each other. You can walk through fire together".
Cool!
Christina Venville |
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