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Sometimes boys are so hard to read. You've been out a few times, maybe even stayed over at each other’s houses. You think everything’s going fine.
You’ve talked about heaps of things, shared a few secrets - but are you going out? Is it okay to call him your boyfriend, and would he call you his girlfriend?
What entitles you to these titles? Some say time, some say shared experiences. Some people just know, while others need to have a chat to figure it out. So which is the best method of finding the answer to this relationship necessity? And when should you do it?
Trusting your instincts This is a more mystical approach, useful only to those who are exceptionally self-assured, or psychic. But instincts are underrated. Be honest – the reason you are worried about whether or not you are exclusive is probably because you’re not, yet. Wait and see – you will know when you can really call yourself taken. The only problem with trusting your instincts is that it requires patience. Oh, and sometimes instincts (and boys) lie.
Common sense Look at the figures. If you've been out more than five times, have steadily moved through the ‘bases’ (but have never felt pushed into anything you weren’t comfortable with), know how many siblings he has, have seen his bedroom, know his favourite band, his dream job, have met at least one family member and hung out with his friends, you are exclusive. Or you should be – and anything he does otherwise at this point can be considered betrayal. Logical, but boys can be mean. Some use the excuse that nothing was said to pull all sorts of rubbish. If you’re dating one of these boys, good riddance.
Letting time tell This is for the patient saints and those us who are so chilled we are almost frozen. Honestly, though, this is the best way. Have a little trust, a little faith, and wait. Time will tell, whether it is in the form of a sweet note from him telling how much he likes you (if he cares enough, you must be a couple), or an introduction to his Nana, in which he uses the ‘g’ word. Stay strong and hold out... the satisfaction of knowing will be all the sweeter for having let it happen naturally. Plus you will seem like such a cool, relaxed girlfriend, he will want to keep you forever.
Having ‘the talk’ Leaving things unspoken allows the boy to use the ‘but we never said…’ excuse after you snap him in the middle of a drunken pash with a random girl at a party. If peace of mind is what you need, make sure. It’s really a matter of trusting your instincts again. You can tell when it's a good time to bring something up – or when it isn’t. Choose a moment when you’re talking intimately. Bring it up in the most unthreatening of manners possible. Say something like ‘so, would you call me your girlfriend?’ Try to sound as if you already know the answer. Oh – and by the time you have this talk, you should pretty much already know the answer.
Three sneaky ways to find out Too scared to ask? Too confused to know for sure? Staying awake at night wondering if you can introduce him as your boyfriend yet? Okay, okay, here are a few slimy methods of finding out if you guys are exclusive.
1.) Use a confidante: Send a mutual friend over to him at a party. Get he or she to point you out (at this point, make sure you are in the middle of laughing at a very funny joke, hair flowing, eye lashes fluttering…) and say something like ‘So, you and your name here?’ Hopefully he says ‘yeah we’re seeing each other’ or suchlike. Hopefully he doesn’t just say ‘we’ve been on a couple of dates’ or something equally non-committal.
2.) Invite yourself to a family do: This works in two ways. If he is fairly keen for you to come along, you’re together. Then you just need to see how he introduces you to his family. Even if he doesn’t use the word ‘girlfriend’, the way he acts should display his feelings. Mumbling your name and keeping you at arm’s length is a bad sign. Touching you, holding your hand, introducing you with pride – all good signs.
3.) Check his MySpace, Bebo, etc: Has he changed himself from ‘single’ to ‘in a relationship’? Although be warned – this is not the be all and end all. He may be waiting for confirmation from you, not wanting to seem too forward. Also, he might not be a big internet user. If it hasn’t changed, don’t take it to mean anything too serious – cut to ‘the talk’ if you really need to know what’s going on.
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stayed over at each other’s houses. You think everything’s going fine. 
This is a more mystical approach, useful only to those who are exceptionally self-assured, or psychic. But instincts are underrated. Be honest – the reason you are worried about whether or not you are exclusive is probably because you’re not, yet. Wait and see – you will know when you can really call yourself taken. The only problem with trusting your instincts is that it requires patience. Oh, and sometimes instincts (and boys) lie. 
times, have steadily moved through the ‘bases’ (but have never felt pushed into anything you weren’t comfortable with), know how many siblings he has, have seen his bedroom, know his favourite band, his dream job, have met at least one family member and hung out with his friends, you are exclusive. Or you should be – and anything he does otherwise at this point can be considered betrayal. Logical, but boys can be mean. Some use the excuse that nothing was said to pull all sorts of rubbish. If you’re dating one of these boys, good riddance. 
