So you're sick of renting and want to buy your own home with your partner. Without that band around your finger - the one that says (hopefully) forever, should you take the plunge and get yourselves a mortgage?

Another reason to say no - or at least, not for now - is if you have differing ideas about what you want from life in the next 5, 10 or even 20 years. If you want a house but you also want to spend the next few years on the road, you might want to put it off until after you've stretched your legs a bit. Think of owning a home together as a significant step towards being together forever. If you don't want this, then for goodness sake, don't do it!

Legally speaking
Like getting married, buying a house is a legal thing, which involves paperwork and a lot of discussion. And like anything involving money - or debt - it is far easier to get into than it is to get out of. After considering whether you are ready emotionally, you might want to think about what would happen if it all goes wrong. You never know - your dream relationship may fall apart - and you will have a big mess of a split property to sort out as well as the myriad other problems involving losing the love of your life.

This topic is covered by the Property (Relationships) Act, which applies to couples in de facto relationships, including same-sex couples, as well as married couples and those in civil unions.  As a general rule, you and your partner are each entitled to half of the property and all the assets that you have gathered over the course of your relationship. There are other rules though, so you should definitely talk to a lawyer about the things that could occur. Don't think of this as a negative conversation. You are being realistic about the unpredictable nature of the future.

Making it happen
So, you've assessed the potential problems and decided the time is nigh. You are ready to dive into that own-your-own-home dream! Congratulations! Now, you need to meet with a bank manager and talk options. Make sure you are realistic about how much you can afford - and don't be afraid to pay more/less than your partner if they earn more/less than you do. There is no need to think along the lines of being 'kept' or playing the role of sugar mummy. We're all equals these days.

You should think of your life together as a combined effort, a mish-mash of love, respect, consideration - and getting ahead money-wise. Plus, you can always console yourself with the fact that you're the one who pushes out the babies, if there are any. If you're the lower earner, then that's worth a few thousand on its own - and if you make more, he'll be the one who brings home the bacon when you're on maternity leave. It will all even out in the end.

Happy house-hunting!

Camille