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There comes a point in a long term relationship when going dutch starts to get a bit tired. At the supermarket, the check out operator prepares herself for performing mathematical feats when she sees you and your partner wander over to her aisle with your groceries.
Can you split that in half? You ask, considering the eftpos transactions you have made this month.
Or maybe you and your partner tend to take the shopping in turns. He buys the beer; you buy the necessities. Feel like your spending is a little out of whack? It could be time to get a joint bank account.
Are you ready? You will probably only be interested in this article if you are living with your partner and you have been together for a good couple of years. Before this, money should probably not be a consideration in your relationship – it tends to sour the romance. But eventually, finances do need to be sorted, because they can cause more trouble than they are worth.
Ask yourself these five questions. If the answer to any of them is negative, think again before opening a joint bank account.
1.) Would you let him take your eftpos card on a night out, without you? 2.) Do you know his pin number? 3.) Would you trust him to remember to feed your cat when you were away? 4.) Do you know how much money he earns – and does he know your salary? 5.) Do you know the state of his debts?
These questions are to do with trust and honesty. Before you put money into an account that someone else can access, you should have full trust that this person is honest with you at all times, or at least when it counts. You should know this person’s financial situation inside and out. While it is nice to believe that love conquers all, unfortunately it doesn’t conquer power bills and water rates, so it’s a good idea to be careful.
How to work it There are several ways to work a joint bank account. Here a few common ones:
1.) An account for bills and rent, in which you put a nominal amount to cover this unfortunately important expenditure. Pros: This works out well, as neither of you feels as though they are getting a raw deal by always being the one who takes care of the power bill, or similar. This way you know for sure everything is being split by halves.
Cons: You must be careful not to dip into this account for other reasons, like, say, a bottle of wine on a Sunday night. I might be projecting here…but with a bit of trust between you and a touch of self-control you should be able to make this work without any trouble.
2.) An account that covers the above, plus grocery shopping.
Pros: You don’t need to worry about the whole splitting the bill thing, or feeling as though you are getting a raw deal when you pick up the bread and milk for the tenth time this month…
Cons: It is easy to talk yourselves into believing that other grocery-like expenses count as groceries. Again, self control should help with this.
3.) An account that covers all of the above, but you also throw in a few extra dollars to cover socialising and weekend fun.
Pros: The weekends become more exciting as you check your joint account and decide together what you would like to do with your spending money.
Cons: If you spend it all on spending, you might find it causes a few hassles when the bills arrive. You must make sure you get each others’ approval before using this money. 4.) You put all of your money into one joint account.
Pros: There is something romantic about giving it all up for the pair of you.
Cons: You need to be making a similar amount of money, or else one person is going to feel a little hard done by when you spend equally, but don’t contribute as much. Trust needs to be 100% for this to work, as it is possible for one person to run away with a lot of cash.
Taking precautions When you open a joint bank account, you will have the option of making it open to both of you, or to one of you only. Be realistic about this. If you know you are a terrible spender and your partner is great with money, then let him be the one who can access it. However, if you have any doubts about your relationship, well, you shouldn’t be opening the account, but if you have decided to go for it, make it accessible to you both. This way you know you can pull your money out if needs be.
Talk to the bank manager (alone if you like) about what would happen if either of you took off with the joint funds. Really, though, at this point, trust should not be an issue. If something like this does happen, you could put it down to experience – and hunt me down for not warning you of the consequences.
Camille Butler
Reader anecdotes on joint accounts Here is what some nzgirls do to manage money in their relationships:
“I pay for the groceries and he pays for our meals out. Seeing as we have quite classy taste in food and tend to eat out at least twice a week, this works out pretty even.”
“I met him when he had already bought a house, so I pay him rent which goes towards his mortgage. I’m not totally sure how big the mortgage is…When he sells the house in a couple of years we are going to buy one together. Until then I don’t want to ask!”
“We split everything down the middle. We earn about the same amount, so we always just go halves. The only annoying thing about this is that we end up with a lot of transactions – I sometimes think we should just get a joint account.”
“We have a joint savings account and we put the same amount in it every week. For all our other expenses – well, I pay the power, he pays the phone and insurance. We pay our own rent and tend to split supermarket shopping down the middle.”
“We have a joint account and we pay for everything that we do together and all the bills and rent with that. We put the same amount into it from our pay each week, which is usually about three quarters of what I get paid. It’s a bit tempting when I have run out of money on my personal account, not to spend on the joint one, but I don’t tend to do it – at least not often.”
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starts to get a bit tired. At the supermarket, the check out operator prepares herself for performing mathematical feats when she sees you and your partner wander over to her aisle with your groceries. 
Ask yourself these five questions. If the answer to any of them is negative, think again before opening a joint bank account.
2.) An account that covers the above, plus grocery shopping.
3.) An account that covers all of the above, but you also throw in a few extra dollars to cover socialising and weekend fun.